1
Main aasha karta hun
Ki iss diwali ke sunder mauke pe,
Diwali ki aloakik Prakaash se,
Tumhare dimaag me kuch ujala ho.
Aur tum insaano jaisa
Vyavhaar karna shuru kardo.!!!!
Happy Deepaval
2
Stylish Breakup-
Boy bought a gift for his girlfriend.
G.F : what the hell wud i
do with this diwali rocket??
Boy : you wanted stars naa?
Now sit on it and Get lost.
3
One boy went to meet his girlfriend
when he came back at home
mom asked
kahaan gaey they ?
boy:us se milney
mom: kis liye?
boy: haan bohat kiss liye:D
4
Main aasha karta hun
Ki iss diwali ke sunder mauke pe,
Diwali ki aloakik Prakaash se,
Tumhare dimaag me kuch ujala ho.
Aur tum insaano jaisa
Vyavhaar karna shuru kardo.!!!!
Happy Deepaval
2
Stylish Breakup-
Boy bought a gift for his girlfriend.
G.F : what the hell wud i
do with this diwali rocket??
Boy : you wanted stars naa?
Now sit on it and Get lost.
3
One boy went to meet his girlfriend
when he came back at home
mom asked
kahaan gaey they ?
boy:us se milney
mom: kis liye?
boy: haan bohat kiss liye:D
4
GIRLZ OF 1995*
"AGAR TUM MIL JAO ZAMANA CHOIR DENGE HUM"
GIRLZ OF 2007*
AGAR TUM MIL JAO PURANA CHOR DENGE HUM
"AGAR TUM MIL JAO ZAMANA CHOIR DENGE HUM"
GIRLZ OF 2007*
AGAR TUM MIL JAO PURANA CHOR DENGE HUM
5
A love letter from biscuit maker:
Dear marie, today is good day,
u r anmol for me...
but u have crack jacked my heart,
bcoz i have a little heart,
now i m in 50/50 position...
Dear marie, today is good day,
u r anmol for me...
but u have crack jacked my heart,
bcoz i have a little heart,
now i m in 50/50 position...
6
Girl:Its 2 tight
Boy:Dont worry,Ill do it slowly,
Gal:Push it in,
Boy:Ah..I cant,
Gal:Its painful,
Boy:Forget it.
.
.
.
.
Well buy new WEDDING RING!
Boy:Dont worry,Ill do it slowly,
Gal:Push it in,
Boy:Ah..I cant,
Gal:Its painful,
Boy:Forget it.
.
.
.
.
Well buy new WEDDING RING!
8
Interviewer:what is skeleton?
Sardar:Sir, skeleton is a person
who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!!
Sardar:Sir, skeleton is a person
who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!!
9
Height of coolness:
2 Guys coming out of the examination Hall with chips and coke in hands....
1st guy:which paper was it?
2nd guy:I think maths......
1st guy:(surprisingly) you read the question paper?
2nd guy: no I see a girl sitting besides me using calculator:>
2 Guys coming out of the examination Hall with chips and coke in hands....
1st guy:which paper was it?
2nd guy:I think maths......
1st guy:(surprisingly) you read the question paper?
2nd guy: no I see a girl sitting besides me using calculator:>
10
In bio practical:
Examiner:Tell me the name of
this bird by seeing it's legs only?
Sardar:I don't know.
Examiner:You failed, what's your name?
Sardar:See my legs & tell my name
Examiner:Tell me the name of
this bird by seeing it's legs only?
Sardar:I don't know.
Examiner:You failed, what's your name?
Sardar:See my legs & tell my name
11
One Of The Best Quote,
Always have a
BACKUP
BEFORE
BREAKUP! :p
Always have a
BACKUP
BEFORE
BREAKUP! :p
12
A Good Teacher Is Who
Tells To Study Hard...
But,,
A Best Teacher Is Who
Stands Outside D
Examination Hall N Shouts. . .
"OYE CHECKING WALE AA GAYE
APNI APNI PARCHIY CHUPA LO..." =P =D
13
Tells To Study Hard...
But,,
A Best Teacher Is Who
Stands Outside D
Examination Hall N Shouts. . .
"OYE CHECKING WALE AA GAYE
APNI APNI PARCHIY CHUPA LO..." =P =D
13
Police Officer: I arrest people, But, when I go home, I'm under house arrest, by Wife
Professor: I give lectures to students, But, when I go home, I get Lectured hourly, by wife
CEO: I'm the Boss, But, when I go home, I always feel like an employee, by wife
Judge: I give Justice, but when I go home, I Beg for Justice, by wife
14
Professor: I give lectures to students, But, when I go home, I get Lectured hourly, by wife
CEO: I'm the Boss, But, when I go home, I always feel like an employee, by wife
Judge: I give Justice, but when I go home, I Beg for Justice, by wife
14
Jab barish hoti hai, Tum yaad aate ho.
Jab kali ghata chaye, Tum yaad ate ho,
Jab bheegte hain tum yaad aate ho,
Bataoo Meri umbrella Kab wapis kro ge!
15
Jab kali ghata chaye, Tum yaad ate ho,
Jab bheegte hain tum yaad aate ho,
Bataoo Meri umbrella Kab wapis kro ge!
15
A beautiful girl goes to Professor cabin
and
say
that i will do anything to pass in the exams
and professor says
NOW OPEN YOUR
.
.
.
.
.
.
Books And Study
and
say
that i will do anything to pass in the exams
and professor says
NOW OPEN YOUR
.
.
.
.
.
.
Books And Study
16
If a man is allowed to select a girl
from 90 girls
and
Even if most beautiful is picked,
There's still the pain of losing
the remaining EIGHTY NINE....:p
from 90 girls
and
Even if most beautiful is picked,
There's still the pain of losing
the remaining EIGHTY NINE....:p
17
Taste this SMS
Did u feel da taste of ginger?
No?
Sure?
Well.....
BANDAR KYA JAANE ADRAK KA SWAAD!!
Did u feel da taste of ginger?
No?
Sure?
Well.....
BANDAR KYA JAANE ADRAK KA SWAAD!!
18
Question : Why do girls close
their eyes while kissing a guy?
Guess��
Guess
.
.
.
Answer : Yeh ladkiyan ladkon
ko kabhi khush nahi dekh sakti.
their eyes while kissing a guy?
Guess��
Guess
.
.
.
Answer : Yeh ladkiyan ladkon
ko kabhi khush nahi dekh sakti.
19
1st ever intelligent sardar.
Teacher: what do u call a person
who cannot hear anything?
sardar: u can call him anything,
because he cannot hear anything:-)
20
Teacher: what do u call a person
who cannot hear anything?
sardar: u can call him anything,
because he cannot hear anything:-)
20
Impact of Movies:
Teacher :- Who is Mahatma Gandhi?
Student:- He is the one who helped
Munna Bhai to impress his girlfriend!
Teacher :- Who is Mahatma Gandhi?
Student:- He is the one who helped
Munna Bhai to impress his girlfriend!
21
Examiner:y r u under tension?
Did u forget admit card,ID,or calculator?
studnt:No Sir!
By mistake i have brought tomorrow
exam's pharray (Cheating material) today:-)
22
Did u forget admit card,ID,or calculator?
studnt:No Sir!
By mistake i have brought tomorrow
exam's pharray (Cheating material) today:-)
22
My Girlfriend Told Me
If I Bought Her One More Stupid Gift
She Would Burn It
So I Bought her A Candle :P
If I Bought Her One More Stupid Gift
She Would Burn It
So I Bought her A Candle :P
23
Husband wife watching an IPL match together:
After 5 minutes:
Wife: Is this Bret Lee?
Husband: No, this is Chris Gayle, Bret Lee is a bowler.
Wife: Okay, oh look, another wicket.
Husband: No, this is just a replay of the last one.
Wife: Hmm, looks like India is going to win this one.
Husband: It's Bangalore vs Mumbai.
Wife: How many runs they need to win now?
Husband: 72 runs in 36 balls.
Wife: Eh! That's easy, just 2 runs in 1 ball.
Husband: *Turns off the TV*
Wife: Turns it on again and starts watching "Daily serial"
Husband: Who is girl here ?
Wife: Don't disturb me please .
24
After 5 minutes:
Wife: Is this Bret Lee?
Husband: No, this is Chris Gayle, Bret Lee is a bowler.
Wife: Okay, oh look, another wicket.
Husband: No, this is just a replay of the last one.
Wife: Hmm, looks like India is going to win this one.
Husband: It's Bangalore vs Mumbai.
Wife: How many runs they need to win now?
Husband: 72 runs in 36 balls.
Wife: Eh! That's easy, just 2 runs in 1 ball.
Husband: *Turns off the TV*
Wife: Turns it on again and starts watching "Daily serial"
Husband: Who is girl here ?
Wife: Don't disturb me please .
24
Boss hangs a poster in Office
"I AM THE BOSS, DO NOT FORGET"
He returns from lunch, finds a slip on his desk.
"Ur wife called, she wants her poster back home."
"I AM THE BOSS, DO NOT FORGET"
He returns from lunch, finds a slip on his desk.
"Ur wife called, she wants her poster back home."
25
What does ILU means?
I= I
L= Love
U=Urdu
so I love urdu...
tum kya samjhey they...
I love ullu..
to haan mein tum say bhi pyar karta hoon
I= I
L= Love
U=Urdu
so I love urdu...
tum kya samjhey they...
I love ullu..
to haan mein tum say bhi pyar karta hoon
26
27
A sardarji goes to a chinese restaurant
and puts his finger
on the last of menu: Bring this.
Waiter: Oh! you can't get it
because he is the owner of restaurant.
and puts his finger
on the last of menu: Bring this.
Waiter: Oh! you can't get it
because he is the owner of restaurant.
Man outside phone booth: Excuse me !!
You are holding the phone since 20 mins.
&
haven't spoken a word..!!!
Man inside: I'm talking to my wife
You are holding the phone since 20 mins.
&
haven't spoken a word..!!!
Man inside: I'm talking to my wife
28
Yash Johar is producing a new film
& is searching 4 new talent.
I've suggested ur name.
Pls go & meet him.
The movie's name is "AQAL HO NA HO"
& is searching 4 new talent.
I've suggested ur name.
Pls go & meet him.
The movie's name is "AQAL HO NA HO"
29
2 men went 2 a callgirl.
1st went in and came out n said
"Na my wife is better."
2nd went in and came out n said
"U R right ur wife is much better."
1st went in and came out n said
"Na my wife is better."
2nd went in and came out n said
"U R right ur wife is much better."
30
Meri zindagi per faqat itna ehsan ker do,
Ik benam si mohabbat mere naam kerdo,
Ik subha ko milo aur shaam kerdo,
Aur sham tak mere ghar ka sara kam kerdo,
Ik benam si mohabbat mere naam kerdo,
Ik subha ko milo aur shaam kerdo,
Aur sham tak mere ghar ka sara kam kerdo,
No comments:
Post a Comment